Friday, September 25, 2015

beautiful ruins

-I don’t know, she said. Sometimes I don’t feel special at all.

-Nonsense. You are special. Everybody knows that.

-But I just read this book, she said, about these magnanimous characters whose lives were reduced to nothing. This famous actress lined up for greatness. Ends up a widowed theater teacher in small-town Idaho, dies of ovarian cancer. You know, all these larger-than-life characters – these people in their twenties – thought they were going to live big colorful lives, on the coast of Italy or on stage or in Hollywood or on Wall Street or something, because they thought that they were different, and they WERE different, but, then life happened and their dreams got away and they stopped chasing whatever it was that made them feel alive. Take me, for example. I used to think I wasn’t ordinary. In fact, I used to be sure that I wasn’t. I am so obviously different, I would think. But these days, I have to ask how many people, how many “burn-outs,” thought that that they were different, special, extraordinary, and now they work a day job and are in retail or insurance or some other silly, shitty, arbitrary, black-and-white, colorless thing, and they never

(He interrupts her)

-You are very important. I have to think that you have some substantial impact on everyone that you meet.

-That is really nice of you.

-It’s true.

-That makes me feel better. I think I am sad when I feel ordinary, so thank you for making me feel special.

-You are special.

(Pause)

Actually, you are extraordinary.

4 comments:

  1. Been following you blog for about two years. Love the way your write. Perfectly captures what its like to be twenty-something trying to figure life out.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Been following you blog for about two years. Love the way you write. Perfectly captures what it's like to be twenty-something trying to figure life out.

    ReplyDelete